So I was offered some new advice yesterday - about breaking down. The advice was - do it. Feel it. Be in it. All through it. Just get messy with it, feel it all, and then there will be space on the other side.
It's a funny time I'm in. This leg stuff is frustrating but that's just one part of a few things going on. Huge? Yes. Slow? Yes. My physio is saying "I've had people recover faster than you - and people move slower than you. You're on track, just keep going. We will find what works, and work around what doesn't work." It's refreshing - I need encouragement, but I also need reality.
But I'm also cleansing - a few weeks of hardcore painkillers has messed up my digestion, and months of pain and paracetamol and yes, sugar (cause no one is gonna make me feel bad and take away the sugar too!) is catching up. So I've been on cleanse for 2 weeks - and the results are pretty minimal. I'm used to them being FAR OUT AMAZING.
And I'm finding it hard to read. Reading is my saviour! But I pick up a book - read a page, and have to re-read it because I've not taken any in.
So I don't have yoga asana, meditation, reading, naughty but yummy foods... it's a strange time. I'm trying to do all this stuff - but it's like my soul is a little cracked and broken. So I've taken this advice. And I'm just being gentle. A couple more weeks of reduced yoga teaching (physio's recommendation - and knee pain suggestion), early nights, crying, laughing, napping, hibernating.... it's all on the cards.
How are you going friends? Tell me where you are and what's going on for you. xo